Trying to not be a Jackass

This is a confession of my difficulties....

(Dirt Corps Class Session)

1) I'm considering leaving Dirt Corps. I'm not getting enough hours to support myself, and a degree of awkwardness is forming.

 I'm the only student, who speaks english as her primary language, and I'm starting to feel that I don't belong...I love Dirt Corps, and it is lacking money. It's a hard choice to make. Am I taking advantage of Dirt Corps? Should Dirt Corps support someone who is more disadvantaged than me? Do people just see me as a white asshole?

Will any other jobs even consider me?

2) The Marine Electric Class is feeling too easy. I'm having a lot of trouble paying attention and being respectful, which is a shame because I really like my teacher. ..I'm trying my best not to be a Jackass

3) I feel like quitting Scrambling. It's so hard to continue. I don't want to be that out-of-shape jerk, who slows the group down.