I've got to process the information and write to let it go.
My ankle is injured. It's frustrating.
I can walk without pain, but I feel like if I push my right ankle too hard, it's going to break. I canceled an outdoor climbing trip, and I'm not sure when I'll go to the gym again...I guess when I feel confident that I can jump without injury.
Fortunately, it seems to be getting better. It is looking less swollen, and I'm feeling less pain overall.
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What do I think is wrong?
Judging from the location of the pain, the way my foot likes to roll and past history, I think that my peroneal tendon is pissed. It's either peroneal tendon or a support structure. When I do feel pain, I feel it under that lateral malleolus bone protrusion. Sometimes, I can feel an ache under my foot that follows the pathway of the peroneus longus. Sometimes I can feel an ache by the 5th metatarsal, associated with the peroneus brevis. (Yes, I have been looking at anatomy pictures. I hope I spelled everything correctly.)
(image source = http://img.medscapestatic.com/pi/meds/ckb/11/43211tn.jpg)
In the morning and evening, my ankle feels achy. During most of the day, I barely feel anything at all- --except if I jump or lean on it. When I make a circle with my toe, I hear a popping, which concerns me greatly but am really hoping that goes away.
I'm going to treat it like it peroneal tendinosis.
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What's my plan?
1) I'm trying to stay off my foot... I've probably been most faithful to the lying around aspect of recovery....
Though, it is not braced or taped, which might be a mistake. It won't be my first mistake, it probably won't be my last...but I'm making it.
I've been doing Hot Yoga, and I'm hoping to start swimming soon...because yupiness is how I roll
2) I want the peroneal tendon to be loose, and so I've been putting my leg in a hot bath and been trying to massage my peroneal muscles...Also, who doesn't love hot relaxing bath?
3) My peroneal muscles are huge. I need to strengthen my other lower leg muscles to oppose the tyranny of the peroneals. I'm hoping to do balance exercises, foot exercises and all that fun stuff.
4) My upper hips need to be loosened. So, I'm going to work on the hamstrings, psoas and such. It be great if I could balance my hips out.
5) My feet are small for my body. I want them to expand. It's occurred to me that my feet might be a little wide for the average women's shoe. Right now, I'm aiming for flat and wide. ...Though, I might make different decisions in the future.
6) When my ankle gets strong enough I'm going to start jumping exercises..like... dear god.. box jumps
7) I'm going to do 14 days of mobility exercises...starting now..no, I mean tomorrow.. no, the day after tomorrow...I will find something to like about it. Right now, doing mobility exercises alone feels like being exiled with a La Cross ball. I'm so lazy. Yesterday, I started mobility exercises and was so tortured from the boredom that I ended up sobbing.
Mostly I've been just doing nothing and being a bum. (I've been clothes shopping. People have been complimenting me on my fashion taste lately -- which is odd)
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What is my emotional state?
A little disappointed, a little sad.
I'm doing nothing with my life.
My job hunt has been a complete failure. There is nothing like having no skills, a bad attitude and a limp to entice prospective employers.
The only thing that cheers me up is Sam, videos of clumsy puppies, and if my ankle doesn't get better, the prospect of getting a bitching -ass-gold pimp cane.
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