Not Fitting the Mold

My ankle is in the final stages of healing.

I suspect that a culprit (one of them) for the injury is that my shoes are too narrow, and that this problem has been ongoing for years. It probably started before college and has slowly progressed. When I think of all the ways I've abused my feet and ankles, a cinematic montage of misdeeds passes before my eyes.

Similarly when I look at my life, from the microcosm of my feet, a theme emerges. I've been trying to fit into molds that don't fit, and as a result, I've become weaker and less functional over the years.

 I know that socially, physically, and probably mentally I've been regressing. I don't think it's old age, I think that the molds I have followed and have envisioned don't work.

A list of molds/models come to mind...

shoes
chairs/ cars
bras

Even more abstract things...

romantic relationships
non-romantic relationships
job expectations
life path expectations
gender
age determination
mental capacity
a definition of modern independence

and other things I have yet to find...

I could rant about each one of these things, but my point is that fitting into molds can be debilitating. And yet at the same time, these models are needed. Wearing shoes is not evil. Feet need a degree of protection, especially in our modern environment.

How can I support myself, continue to do exciting activities, and have a a meaningful existence?

Anyways, I do have some tangible goals. That tendon on my right ankle, it needs to be less tight..My ankle needs to be strong enough to support the shifting weight of my fat ass. How do I achieve this? I'll fool around until something seems to be working...or not.

My current plan is this...

I'm going to try to widen my feet with toes spacers,get wider shoes, workout my ankles and feet barefoot, and then try to loosen up my hips and legs.   ..while periodically taking pictures or getting documentation to try to monitor progress.

Welcome to my new foot fetish.

So, above is both my ankles. You can see that the tendon is tight. Normally, I wouldn't fuss over a detail like that, but my ankles have been giving me grief.

Above is Mat and Sam's ankles. You don't see pressure from the peroneal tendon. 

This is the top of my foot, and then you see my foot in spacers. I don't want to obsess over my feet and ankles, but I do think I'm reaching that tipping point, where if I don't obsess now, it's going to be so much worse in the future.

Anyways,onwards to good feet and free spirits! 

(The above picture is not an example of a free spirit, it is the oppression of job hunting and nicely combed hair. Long live the bums! )